Heroes

I figured since my last 4 posts this week have been about Hulk Hogan, that the 5th and final post of the week should also be about him (sorta) that way it was a sweet week of the Hulkster.

Now that I have finally met the #1 person I have always wanted to meet. I figured that I'd make a list of those I have met, and those that I would love to meet, sort of like a "hit list" where I get to kill 'em with kindness.

So without further adieu, here is my list:

Andy Kaufman (deceased--but a boy can dream)

Ian Curtis (deceased--but a boy can dream)

Hulk Hogan (would love a second meeting)

Damon Lindelof (Executive Producer and pretty much the top writer for LOST. He wrote my favorite episode "The Constant," and after I saw it I said to myself "I must meet whoever wrote this episode and give them a hug." So whenever you're ready for that hug Damon, I'll be ready also.)

Mark E. Smith (I have a day dream where I make something of myself in the comedy(writing) scene and I meet Mark at a party. I then confess to him that while I was struggling, I downloaded A LOT of the Fall albums, and they kept me going. I then cut him a check to make us "even" and he's cool with that. Then we discuss the Fall, H.P. Lovecraft, and Twin Peaks!)

Davey Havok (met him during the Art of Drowning era, and I'm glad I did then, because now I wouldn't wait on line for 2+ hours--and even then during my intense obsession over him, he disappointed me by not wanting to discuss the Misfits. Farewell old friend.)

Glenn Danzig [circa 1977-1983] (when he was in the Misfits, he was at his coolest peak. After that he steadily became more insane and less awesome.)

David Lynch (super nice, and I'd love to meet him again, although I won't pay $90 the next time)

Ken Colly (Admiral Piett himself, super nice guy, and I'd love to pick up where we left off...him signing my memorabilia for free, and sticking it to the convention people.)

Stephen Colbert (great guy, but hard of hearing if you ask him if he is a fan of Andy Kaufman. But he's more than eager to tell you his favorite Lord of the Rings character--Faramir-- and happy to tell you who would win in a fight to the death; Cap'n Crunch or Count Chocula--"Cap'n crunch has crunch cannons.")

Zach Galifianakis (very nice, especially when you can't make it into his show. But he does tend to care more about what attractive women say to him when they touch his shoulder, as opposed to fat, geeky, aspiring comics...thanks a lot, Kristen!)

Leo Allen (met him at a stand-up show. I told him that I appreciate everything he's done. He seemed genuinely appreciative of my compliment...so yea, we're best friends now! haha)

Jon Glaser (I'd love to meet him, but I'd love even more to be on the same show as him. That would kick major ass!)

Any Joy Division Members (since they did help make my favorite songs, ha)

Mick Foley (ridiculously nice...especially with kids, and he writes interesting books...what a combo.)

Efrem Schultz and the rest of Death by Stereo (glad I met them back in 05, because I stopped rocking them not too long afterward. Sorry gang.)

John Pettibone (met him 2 times and he is the nicest guy ever. We discussed Joy Division--his favorite song is Novelty because "it hits home"--and he gave 2 free stickers to my friend, so nice)

Ian Leck of Voorhees (I'd love to let him know that his vocals are the best!)

Tony Miles (deceased--but a boy can dream)


Keanu Reeves (Has been a favorite actor of mine since I was young and first saw Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. Since then I am immediately interested in any film he appears in-save the Lake House, and the Day the Earth Stood Still)

Bill Pullman (another favorite actor of mine. While everyone was excited for a summer blockbuster starring Will Smith, I was more than happy to see Bill Pullman as the President.)

Lance Henriksen (after falling in love with his character, Frank Black, on MillenniuM I have desired to meet him for quite a while. I also hear that he is super nice.)

Kyle Machlachlan (played Agent Dale Cooper on Twin Peaks, and seems to be an all-around nice guy, Diane. <--semi-TP reference)

Masi Oka (the actor who plays Hiro Nakamura. HE is the reason why I watch Heroes still--no matter how bad it's been since season 2. They keep hinting at his character dying and if that happens, they will lose a viewer for good...me. I just love when he makes his face jiggle while trying to freeze time or time-travel)

Franz Kafka (deceased--but a boy can dream)

Bauhaus (any member will do since I've recently fallen for Tones on Tail, and have been into Love & Rockets for a while. I'd be thrilled to meet anyone of them--but if I had my pick I'd go for Peter Murphy, of course.)

----And now to end the gay rumors, I'll put women on this list also----


Madchen Amick (played Shelly Johnson on Twin Peaks and I consider her to be the most beautiful woman in the moving pictures since TP debuted. Super pal Chontel agrees.)

Hayden Panettiere (Claire-bear on Heroes. I believe she's attractive. Super pal Chontel does not agree, and makes fun of me for this. Boo-hoo.)

So there we have it. I'm sure I forgot someone but this list looks pretty complete to me. 95% male, 3% deceased, 2% female. NOTE: I fought like hell to not put in fictional characters, sorry Emperor Palpatine.

-a.

I lied to every one of my friends :(

It's true (finally). I said that I was not going to read Hogan's new book because it had nothing to do with his wrestling career. But after meeting him, it felt appropriate to just take a gander.

And now after 2 days I am more than halfway through his book, AND it does include discussions on his wrestling career-but not as detailed as I had hoped. At least they are there though. It's a quick and interesting read (especially for 26 year old Hulkamaniacs!)

So do yourself a favor and pick it up because no one will be borrowing my copy since it's signed. (those same rules apply to my signed copy of Twin Peaks and my copy of Black Sails in the Sunset sorry friends)

-a.

Whatcha' Gonna Do!? (Part 3)

It finally happened. After twenty-six years of waiting I have finally met my favorite living person. I've daydreamed of this day, it usually ended with us grabbing lunch and watching his greatest matches in one sitting, while discussing the cool behind-the-scenes drama regarding the outcome of each match. Not to be picky but sadly it did not happen that way--but it was still AWESOME!

Normally I'm early or right on time to something, but yesterday I swore that I had to return to Barnes & Noble with my ticket at 4:30 pm. At 3:52pm I happened to look at my ticket to see it read: "If you are numbers 1-250 you must be on line by 4 pm."

Without thinking I ran out my house and drove as fast (and safe) as possible to the bookstore. Luckily for me the book store is five minutes away, but still this is the moment I've waited so long for that it was so stupid of me to confuse the time to be there by.

I took the first parking space I could find and ran for the line. They were just letting numbers 20-100 inside. I got in line and was led upstairs, where they placed us in numerical order.

Anticipation set in over the course of sixty-plus minutes of waiting.

Finally it was time, people were cheering and all I could see was a pink bandanna, and Jimmy Hart walk by. Then before I knew it the line was moving...quickly.

I asked the nice people behind me if they'd be so kind as to take a few pictures of me with the Hulkster. They were happy to oblige, and I was even happier that they were happy to oblige.

Then it happened, I was face to face with the Icon Hulk Hogan. Naturally for such an event I wore my Hulkamania shirt. He dropped his marker and said "I like the shirt, bro" and went to shake my hand. SO I said in my coolest voice: "I like YOU, a lot!"
Then our handshake was over and he was already signing, so I figured that I should fill the silence, and I did by saying: "I have been such a huge fan of yours since I was a little kid. This is so BADASS!" The Hulkster slammed my book shut, and extended his hand another time for hand shake #2! I was super jazzed to touch palms, and he said "Thank you for coming down." (PSsssshhh, what is he thanking me for? I didn't bodyslam Andre the Giant) So this little man inside of me who has been trained to speak with sultans said: "Thank you, a thousand times!"

Then that was it--

Or was it? Then I got to shake hands with "The Mouth of the South" Jimmy Hart, who thanked me for stopping by, and I told him that I love him.

Then security and the kind staff at Barnes & Noble made me move away because they needed that area clear. And that was that. It was surreal, badass, and super awesome simultaneously. What a cocktail of emotion.

Whatcha' Gonna Do!? (Part 2)

I just woke up from a nap. That's now two nights of little sleep. Probably because I'm so excited to meet the 6 time WWF and 6 time WCW World Champion HULK HOGAN!

I got up at 6am today (thanks to my dad) and raced to the Barnes & Noble near my house to wait on line. I was relieved to see about twelve Hulkamaniacs already waiting. All I had to do was endure 2.5 hours of standing and I'd definitely meet the man who slaughtered Sgt. Slaughter.

Well I did it. 2.5 hours later the manager of Barnes & Noble came out and handed us tickets that ensure our spot in line to meet him. I got #29, so I guess people ahead of me got extra tickets, but whatever #29 is way better than #413.

I'm leaving in less than an hour to go back and wait on line. It's an exciting time to be alive. Now they said we cannot pose for pictures with "Hollywood" but I'll ask the nice lady who discussed books with me all morning if she'd snap a picture of him signing my book, and me being nervous/excited.

I'm so jazzed, I feel as if I could leg drop Mercury!

Part 3 comes tomorrow.

Whatcha' Gonna Do!? (Part 1)

I set very high goals for myself as a child. 1) Get a dog. 2) Get an in-ground pool. 3) Get a house that includes stairs. (basements do NOT count!) and 4) Meet Hulk Hogan.

I never lost that Hulkamaniac inside of me. He stayed strong saying his prayers, taking his vitamins, training (well not really), and believing in himself (also not really). But nonetheless he stayed strong. And finally the week of my 26th birthday I shall meet the Icon Hulk Hogan at a local Barnes & Noble.

Tomorrow is the day. I'm more excited than when Marty Jannety returned after having Shawn Michael's smash his face into glass at the Barbershop corner, I'm more dazzled than the "Million Dollar Man," Bobby "the Brain" Heenan, and Andre combined when they saw Miss Elizabeth remove her skirt at SummerSlam, and dare I say more pumped than when the Hulkster body slammed Andre the Giant at WreslteMania III.

How will this turn out? I'd like to say "epic" but that's an understatement.

Part 2 comes tomorrow.

I'm Not Asian.

Growing up I had a best friend. His name was Michael, and after three years of being friends he asked me if I was Chinese. I laughed and said "no." Then I asked him if he ever noticed my love for pizza, and raviolis. He just still assumed I was Chinese until the day he asked me that question.

I went to my local library to meet NY Times best-selling author and WWF wrestler: Mick Foley, to have him sign my copy of his book; Have a Nice Day! I introduced myself as "Adam" and he signed my glorious paperback edition and I was on my merry way--until I got into my car. You see, he signed it "To Ada." Unsure if you guys know, but "Ada" is a women's name in Japan. (NOTE: see Ada Wong from Resident Evil 2)

Last night I got to go to Danny's Upstairs, it's a comedy club in New Jersey, and while I walked by Danny Aiello, I heard him ask to one of my friends in comedy: "Who's the Asian?" I was sure that I was mistaken, but I still asked said comedy friend if Danny Aiello did in fact assume that I was Asian. He laughed and was impressed that I heard this random question.

So I have one old friend and two celebrities assume I am a man of the Orient. Most of the time people ask if I am Hispanic or Jewish, and sometimes gay. But the three mentioned above just assumed I was Asian, and went with it. I must say that I am impressed that they were so strong with their beliefs, and I am not offended or anything. I just find it weird that people interpret me so differently...especially the celebs.

Philosophers on Trains: "$4.25"

Yesterday was my TV script-writing class in NYC, so naturally I had to take the train yet again. My class was sadly canceled, and we all left early. I luckily snagged the 7:44pm train and was happy to know that I'd be home by 9:10pm. But dark clouds were gathering.

You see, the 7:44pm train is considered to be a "peak" train. That means a lot of people tend to be on the train at that time, so the powers that be at the Long Island Rail Road decide to charge more money for each rider. So my ticket that was originally $21.50, now jumped up a whopping $4.25 because yuppies flood the train cars.

I felt as if the lady conductor was mistaken when she told me that I owed an additional $4.25. I wanted to explain that I'm not a rich yuppie traveling home to go antiquing. I'm trying to make it in the entertainment biz and as such, am low, low, low on funds. But I couldn't help but feel as if my words would not matter.

But, lucky for the LIRR, I have a suggestion for them. They should only charge the peak prices for people in a full suit. That way it's obvious those with jackets, suits, and ties can afford the annoying peak charge, while us norms can enjoy being screwed at the normal rate.

To me that sounds fair!