Hard Times

Jamie Foxx has recently told Parade magazine that: "It's hard being a celebrity." He couldn't be more correct. Nothing is harder than making a sex tape, having it "leak," getting into disputes with the paparazzi, letting photographers snap upskirt shots of yourself, AND raising a child.

If you think that's hard, then you haven't heard the hardest part; not having talent. It's more of a suggestion in Hollywood these days. If you make jokes about Pedophilia (not mocking the sicko in it) or have "killer" material that involves poor ventriloquism, or wear a low-cut shirt you get to move ahead of the audition line because well "you're gonna be a star!"

Now I know nothing of what I said above remotely relates to Jamie Foxx and that is because he hasn't done anything stupid or immoral. I just needed his quote to mock those "stars" I hate and cannot wait to see burn out finally.

FLEX YOUR HEAD!

NOTE: I also realized majority of my attacks seem to target women, but that is strictly because I hate the socialites smeared in every medium. Apologies, ladies.

A Glimpse of a Star - Kim Kardashian

Now that I am a "celebrity" (see last post regarding my being on TV). I have come across some interesting items such as Kim Kardashian's resume. Check it out:

KIM KARDASHIAN

Kim Kardashian is a published model and "actress." She has been on TV like 4 times, and is on every red carpet because her step dad did some stuff in an old Olympics game.



Experience:
"Sex Tape" .............................................Self..................................Vivid Entertainment
"Keeping Up With the Kardashians" .................Self........................... Ryan Seacrest Productions
"Dancing With the Stars" (Season 7-3 eps).........Self ..................................ABC

Training:
Zero. Can you believe that? This girl has all the bare minimum talent necessary to do the things she has done!

Skills:
See above.


Now obviously, I had to leave out her contact info because Ms. Kardashian likes to keep her anonymity (ignoring the sex tape that catapulted her to the stars...to dance with?).

Now you may be saying to yourself: "this bitch has NO talent." And you'd be right to think so, IF you were NEVER on TV before. I for one have NEVER seen someone play the role of them self so perfectly. Could any of you have sex with a man, then get on a reality show where the little folk of America watch you dance and brand you a "star" (for 3 episodes)? I think not.

I for one applaud you Ms. Kardashian. You were my inspiration for getting on TV, and playing the role of myself as casually as I could. Sadly, noone wanted to have sex or dance poorly while doing so though. Those talentless bastards!

-a.